I was being watched. I could feel it. Sometimes it was so subtle that I felt I was just by chance in their line of sight. A casual 'hi' as I passed by. Looking me directly in the eye when I asked a question.
But other times, the pull of their grazes was so strong, I had to learn to not turn and seek them out. The glances would make my heart beat fast and made me want to run for cover.
Read MoreTeach your adopted child to protect their space and their experiences.
Parents who are adopting children of color, please listen, this is so important. On so many levels.
To do this you will need to take them to the people who can teach them. You need to take them to spaces that hold people of their race and culture. There is no maybe about this.
Read MoreOne particular blizzard was bad. For multiple days I laid near the end of my bed that had a west facing window. I watched the snow blow and make hills while an occasional car or truck or snow plow would make their way by. I would press my fingers into the frost that had collected on the windows and play with the worn headphone cord of my little hand held radio to make sure it was just so so latest pop and country hits would play in each ear.
Read MoreWhen you stand in front of people knowing you are worthy, their attitude about you will change.
This is one of the deepest lessons I have learned in my life, because it taught me that while love can be unconditional, you can't always expect it to be.
One of the most freeing moments of my existence were the words I told my first adoptive mom when she demanded I tell her I loved her.
"I have respect for you as a human being, but I will never love you."
Read MoreA dock on a lake will always be my safe space for contemplating life.
Read MoreWhen accountability is conditional, or only as deep as some one has treated you, or based solely on our own experiences is when you know we as humans are have formed a new level existence. Social media presents us a lot of situations on that we react to instantly. I always get a kick out reading the comments of posts and articles. It always reveals how the lines become blurred when personal responsibility and humanity collide.
On a day like today it makes the comments stand out starkly.
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